PaaartY???!

My Life is a very big party,
Dark crowded stinky rooms,
An Ugly music always booms,
People in circles dance around,
Shouting obsene chorus sounds,
A few drunken girls,
Still giving you disgusted looks,
Many vomit stains,
A bunch of bran brains,
In brawling pains,
The sick kid sneezes
In your face,
The DJ, has bad music taste,
The bartender makes you wait,
Is flirting with his favored mates.
Happy pills effect worns out,
-OH now, or it will be freaking
Misery bouts,
A broken bottle finds your place,
Chug it all down,
Before it's stripped off
From your slate,
Too much of that burns your mouth,
To clear that out,
Give out a random shout,
Sniff this, Chew that,
Shake here, shout again,
Too much shaking
Makes ingredients bland,
The perfect mixup of lava land,
A tiny explosion in your head,
Soon you can't stand,
You can't walk,
Your pendulum swagger,
Is all over the park,
Few legs you bite,
Taste some hits,
Black eyes,
Face in swollen bits,
You somehow make it out,
But you still feel like shit,
A few faces sympathise,
They don't really want to help,
Just watch, mock, yelp,
No one to really pull you up,
Down in all fours,
Cheek on the ground,
feels rough,
So you pass out in a dirty corner,
Searching for bliss.

Why I do not want to believe in luck

             Luck is a word many people often use if they are trying to be modest, but it is also widely thrown around when people out do their expectations, and sometimes when failures hit us in unexplainable circumstances we blame the lack of it. I see people quoting luck all the time, "she had luck, I didn't, that is why I failed", "man I can't believe I got the job, I have to thank my lucky starts".
         But do you realise that the concept of luck takes away the credit entirely from you, i.e it was not because of your hardwork or presence of mind or common sense or even sheer cunningness for the matter but some undefinable random force, so the next time when the same situation presents itself, "you can't confidently say that I have faced and surpassed the situation before  so I believe I have the necessary skills and experience to face it again", but all you can say is luck has to favour me again.
          Similarly in case of a negative situation there is a possibility that you can assess the previous situation come to a conclusion of all that led to your defeat, like lack of preparation, flaw in execution, bad external factors..... and you could prepare yourself in such a way that you could somehow bypass them, sometimes even presume all the probable factors (outside) that could play a role in that particular senario, and try to be ready for them, hence remarkably decreasing the chance of failing again, giving you actual hope. Saying I failed beautiful of lack of luck would mean I have no control over my circumstances, and I can never never really rely on me.
          I would definitely feel safer if my sucess or failure depended on me, my ability, my skillset rather than some magical probality wouldn't you?. Luck if somehow miraculously does exist, is an entity that is best left ignored, as it gives you no actual hope, or reason.
          

The kid with dreams

          Siddarth was so angry with his parents, as they never trusted his potential one bit, so he decided it's time to go, he packed his bags, left the house in wee hours of the morning, with a duffel bag full of his clothes, his guitar and some money and his 10 grade certificate. He had left a letter, explaining to the folks back home the reason for his absence, and how he will come back there as a winner after reaching his destiny.
           He boarded the first bus to the city, he was so excited and scared, had multiple second thoughts about the plan, but this seemed to him like the only way he could ever be a musician, his family was never pleased with his dream of being a guitarist, they explained to him again and again that very few made it big in music, and he was not that talented, studying was the only way for success for middle class families, he was not going to accept any of those excuses, they even went to the extent of stopping his guitar classes because they thought it was an hinderance to his studies, hence he had to leave, he couldn't take it anymore.
            After he made it to the city he had no idea what to do, never having gone anywhere alone before, he was naive, confused, he had to no answers to to the very basic questions for survival like, where to stay, who to contact, how to eat, how to reach his destiny, and the money he had was not going to help him for more than a few days, first day he slept on the bus stand bench, ate in the shops around the bus stand, the next few days, he asked passerbys on how to become a musician, very few stopped and responded, the once who did seemed to give him "multiple choices", "cinema, movies, kollywood, music director, padam", all those advises pointed him to one direction kollywood, he went to AVM  studios in chennai, it was closed down to make way for a multiplex complex, he roamed around the city searching for movie shoots, he asked the crew men for music chances, he was always shooed off, laughed at, rediculed, slowly his money started to dwindle Without any actual work, and he ate less and less until he had nothing to eat just scraps from temples, churches and odd marriage celebrations. He started feeling weak, Sleeping outdoors had taken a toll on his body, he repeatedly got sick, he searched around a few places for a job but they all declined him, he was so hungry so he needed some money, he had this big craving for poori in the road side.
                One day when he was roaming in the sunny afternoon,  Siddarth abruptly sat on the pavement in t-nagar, he spread his blanket, displayed his guitar and the few clean clothes he had with him, ready to sell anything for some food, he was so hungry, he sat there for hours all the while thinking  if he should go back home, or call them, may be God was punishing him for leaving home, he thought, he had been taught that is what happens to bad people like him who chase dreams against norms, kids who do not obey, when someone with a brown cap, beige shorts and khaki tshirts showed up disturbing his thought process, said "how much for those shorts?" Pointing at his favourite pair of black shorts, he didn't know what to say, thought about it and blurted " it's 200", capped guy replied "Rs 200, for these?, these look used, I will give you 70, what do say you?", he nodded, and snatched the money off the man's hand as  he offered it.
           He was about to go get the pooris he had been craving for, when the guy came back, "hey kid, how much for the guitar?", RS 300, Siddarth said spontaneously without thinking, "300? do you even know what this is worth?", examining the guitar which would atleast sell for RS 7000 if it was new "did you steal it from someone?", "no this is mine, I have been learning to play this for years" he replied, "if are you telling me the truth?, play it for me?", and Siddarth did, he played a couple of songs in succession, a small crowd gathered around as he did, he did not winch, it had been a few days since he played so it felt amazing, and when he stopped, all the people applauded, he felt proud, energised, accomplished.
         The man with the hat who waited patiently for all the applause to drown and people to move away, exclaimed "kid you are really good!, we have a small band which plays in functions, we are looking for a back up guitarist, we have decent pay and regular gigs do you want to join?". Siddarth suddenly lost his hunger.

spider

spider

Conformist pigs

I hate to go on a rampage,
But I feel like this is
Right rage,
Why do you get the need,
To showel your filthy noses,
In everyone's business,
"This is the right way!,
You are doing it wrong,
Listen to what I say,
My ways are older
Than time, and day,
I know a few posh words,
I were a fancy dress,
My hair is always parted,
My shelves are always sorted,
I am diplomatic and nice,
I have most populistic opnions,
I must be so wise,
I am always right,
I am always right",
Bugger off kid,
You are not wise,
Being unoriginal is not wise,
It's means you are easily,
Impressionable,
And had a fancy school education,
Your ego has grown a bone,
And has to poke every hole,
You are the person
Who still confuses,
Dress with intelligence,
Words with manners,
Wealth with decency,
And never touched a spanner,
Someone who watches glee,
Don't mind me,
I don't wanna poke your insecurities,
But when everyone is familiar
With those fancy words,
And understand nice is not good
Piccaso is dead,
There was no Shakespeare before Shakespeare,
And begin to create their own style,
You will not be able to
Swim out of your conformist bubble,
Caught  in the back of the stupid race,
You created.

Shortest bloody stories 1 (micro fiction).

       It was the first time he had a syringe in his hand, so trembled to find the patient's vein and slowly injected the drug, 'that was a relief', he thought as everything went well.

        He just started to leave because he had to attend to the next patient, when an agitated voice called "nurse, nurse", he turned to look, a stream of blood splashed on his face and apron.

"Let me drive, let me drive", said the 13 year old tommy to his mother, she looked around and the roads were empty, so it seemed safe enough to let him drive.

        "Be careful", she said before giving him the wheel, he was, he drove with precision and ease, "mommy, this is so cool" he said looking at her, but she looked panicked, "look out" she screamed pointing to the road, the car struck a dog, it gave a big shreak,  and was propelled in the air, hitting the windshield the second time, the white car had multiple patterns of blood changing and  dripping along with gravity, with the dog's brain dangling from the wiper.

"You are it", said Michael tagging his friend rakesh, and started running away from him, Rakesh caught up with Michael soon,  "no you are" tagging him a little harder on his back, Michael lost his balance and fell, without even realising this Rakesh started running away, a clearly frustrated Michael  regaining his balance by now, comprehended there was leagues of distance to cover, so he picked up a rock and thew that as hard as he could at his friend, the rock whizzed and found a little kid who was walking near by, hit him on his nose, leaving him with a deviated septum which herniated through the broken patch of skin, and  a waterfall of blood gushing through the nostrils.

Keloid

It is inappropriate wound healing, where there is excessive fibroblast and blood vessile proliferation.

Symptoms
Itching
Redness
Tenderness.
Claw like distribution to normal skin.

Risk factors
Black population.
Tb.
Piercing, injection sites.

Complications
Infections

Treatment.

Triamicinalone acetate - inj (steroid)

Excise ans skin graft.

Laser therapy.

Silicone compression.

Radiation.

Topical retinol.

Nano fiction

         He called her several times, to say that he loved her before he left for his job abroad, she didn't even pick up. He left without saying how he felt.
         She had lost her phone yesterday.

            Raj scanned the room for his best friend, he was always the life of the party, so he was hard to miss, but Raj could not find him.
             He enquired the coordinators if his friend and college roommate had arrived for the get together. They all gave him confused and sad reactions "errrr, Raj, I am sorry, didn't you know?, vineeth died last year in an accident".

"Son, you could be anything you want to be".
Son "I wanna be a dragon".

         She had lousey taste in men, they always ended up hurting her, so she still looked at him in wonder even after 10 years of marriage, " How did I find him?".

       " what kind of a husband do you want when you grow up?"
       " I want a vampire like Edward".

The Internet crashed, the roommates finally talked to eachother in person, it had been 3 days since they got there.

Real friends and social networking friends are not the same, they both know two different versions of me.
   "Which is the real you?"
    "Duh, ofcourse the social networking version".

Random sets of emotions.

I don't want to hide.

Wear your weakness